Day 19 - A picture and a letter

Day 19 - A picture and a letter


Been a rough day so i though i would lighten the mood with a little comedy, in the form of a letter. So many people have had babies in the past few months it is just nuts. And it has really got me thinking about a few things, and most of your know this already, but i know NOTHING. So here goes nothin...

Dear future baby,

you won't be here for a longggg time but you will probably be one of those colors of the other babies above. I really can't imagine what you will look like because  I saw this thing on 60 minutes about a black and white couple who had a black baby and a white baby, and mixed babies seem to come in all shapes and sizes. Buttt I also heard that being bi-racial is really "in" right now and since i'm half and half you really can't get around the whole mixed thing.


Also , I just want to apologize in advance for making your life tougher than it should be in the beginning. I don't know what to do with you. Hopefully your dad will change your diapers and feed you and stuff because that's not my specialty. You'll probably start to like me once you can eat solid foods because I'm a good cook. Oh yea, and if your baby food tastes weird it's because it's organic and laced with muscle milk and creatine so that you can grow up big and strong and athletic. 


And I can guarantee your room will be nice and neat and your crib will always be clean, but other than that you're on your own. I don't really know what I'll say to you when you get here, because I think baby talk is weird/I'm not good at it. I heard that you're supposed to talk to babies like people so that you can develop their vocabulary. So I will probably use large words like "salutations!" instead of "good morning". Sometime I might even throw in different languages so that I can expose you to other worldly cultures... Bienvienidos! Bonjour! Gutentag! Ni Hao! Just try to listen for a while and when you're ready to talk in sentences then we can really get down to the nitty gritty of life.  If you're a girl baby then we can chat about first wave feminism and go from there....and if you're a boy baby we'll start off with just the basics of life (how to clean up after yourself, how to pee in a toilet, how to spray bathroom spray and courtesy flush...).


And finally....if you spend the first year of your life staring at a woman who looks like the one below, her name is Maeve and I have given you to her because she is a Child Wisperer and she knows what to do with you..... 

well...minus the sharpie writing on her chest

Until next time,
Jenny